Life is full of surprises. Surprises that cause a change in plans. One of those surprises is love, a love you didn't expect to feel so deeply and quickly. Holding my niece just barely a few hours old, in all her innocence and freshness, was instant love. Having an instantaneous bond, one that ran red beneath the skin that would look very similar to mine, it swept me off my feet and changed my life.
I thought I wanted children before that moment yet in an instant my desire multiplied by a thousand, I was overwhelmed with love I needed to pour out into one of these little miracles lying in my arms. All my plans to wait another 2 years flew out the door in that instant.
I didn't act on that impulse, but like someone falling in love I harbored my feelings, contemplating them, trying to see if they were 'right'. And also like someone falling in love, I couldn't stay away from the object of my affection, I wanted to see her as often as possible, I wanted to stare into her beautiful eyes, and have her stare back into mine. I wanted to hold her soft hands, kiss her chubby cheeks, and just hold her for hours. How could I wait one second longer to create this kind of love myself?
But that was it, I couldn't do it by myself, that's not what marriage was about and it's not what I wanted to do regardless. This was my husband's life, and his children too, we needed to be on the same page. Yet I saw a lot of discussion on the topic coming in the VERY near future! A lot nearer than 2 years I tell you!
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